Love Lost
by Beertree
Summary: G1. Two friends who might be more than friends try to work things out after too much highgrade. Contains slash.


Hound staggered down the corridor towards his quarters, deeply regretting that last container of high-grade. Actually, he was regretting the last three containers, or was that four? He couldn't remember and that made him regret it even more. In fact, he couldn't quite remember how he'd made it back to base from the other side of Iacon. Which wasn't a good thing at all.

How he'd let himself get over-charged, he had no idea. He hadn't planned on it happening. He usually avoided it like a virus. Too much high-grade made it difficult to control all of his sensors and senses and he hated the way it left him vulnerable to all kinds of unwelcome sensations. Right now he was having trouble ignoring the air currents brushing against his armor and the information his gyros were giving him about the current orientation of his limbs.

Actually, the soft air felt really good, sending shivers through his entire frame. Unfortunately, he couldn't seem to get the location of his head to match up with the location of his arms and legs. He sighed and squinted, peering down the darkened corridor, trying to locate his room.

Ah, he thought, there. He staggered the rest of the way, his hand on the wall for better balance.

Once he reached his door, though, trouble reared its head. He squinted at the keypad. He could barely make out the symbols on it, and, for the life of him, he couldn't remember his pass code. Left arm on the wall for balance, he leaned down to get a closer look at the pad, which didn't help at all. The code still eluded him.

Hmmmm, wonder if Blue is home, he thought, though he hated the idea of ringing the chime and waking his roommate up if he was recharging. Well, I'm not going to get in this way. He lifted his head slightly and searched for the chime button. Where is that thing? Ah, there. He raised a finger to punch it when he heard footsteps coming down the corridor.

He turned his head to look over the arm that was bracing him and unconsciously drew in the air that preceded the approaching mech.

Ahhh, he thought and smiled. Blue. A happy Blue, his olfactory sensors told him as he unconsciously analyzed the clean, pure scent of well-burned energon. An overcharged Blue, he chuckled to himself, as he picked out the underlying sweetness of well-burned high-grade energon. He savored the scent, shutting his optics off briefly, shivering slightly at the thought of how much he liked that smell, how much he liked the scent of Bluestreak mixed with that sweet smell. He idly wondered if Bluestreak tasted as good as he smelled.

_Primus_ he thought, startled. _Why am I thinking about Bluestreak that way? He's my friend, my roommate. I've never, ever even remotely considered him anything more than that.  
_

Shaking his head in an attempt to banish what were quickly turning into erotic thoughts, he turned his optics back on. He jumped slightly to see Bluestreak standing a few meters away watching him curiously, his head tilted to the side, his mouth quirked up in a small smile, his optics glowing palely in the dim light. Without thinking, Hound pulled another breath of air past his sensors, and Bluestreak's smiled widened into a crocked grin as if he knew exactly what Hound was thinking.

"How do I smell?" he asked the scout, his voice low. It was a question he'd asked often with no more thought behind it than curiosity, but for some reason it now seemed to mean so much more to Hound. Bluestreak took a few steps towards Hound, stopping just within arm reach.

The green mech shivered and wanted nothing more than to back away, widen the distance between them again. He was sure that if he moved his arm he'd crash to the floor and not just because he was very overcharged. Bluestreak's voice, the warmth radiating from his body, his smell, his mere presence was making all his sensors go crazy. His knees weakened and he leaned against the wall.

"You're overcharged," he managed to stutter.

Bluestreak nodded as if Hound had made the most profound statement on Cybertron. "Yes," he agreed solemnly. "Yes, I am. Actually, I'm very overcharged." He rubbed his head mournfully as he peered fuzzily at Hound. "I keep forgetting that Sideswipe's high grade is strong stuff, but, you know, after the first drink it just doesn't seem to matter anymore."

He gazed at Hound for a moment apparently noticing the scout's position for the first time. "What's wrong with you?" Then he laughed, not his normal tight, uneasy giggle but an easy, comfortable laugh. "I don't believe it. You're cratered. Had a good time, then, huh? Good for you. You need to loosen up more often." He paused and thought about that. "Yep, good to loosen up once in a while." He swayed towards the wall and had to brace himself on it. "Not too much, though, huh?" He chuckled quietly for a moment at his own predicament before returning his attention to Hound.

"So, what seems to be the problem?" he asked while trying to stand unassisted by the wall.

"I...I can't remember our pass code."

Gaining his feet again, Bluestreak nodded solemnly. "I see." He pondered the situation, tapping his chin with a finger. He leaned over Hound's arm to get a better look at the keypad.

Hound gritted his mouthplates as Bluestreak brushed against his sensitive armor. i _You're doing this on purpose, aren't you?_ /i he groaned to himself.

Bluestreak studied the keypad for a moment then raised a finger to enter a number. While his finger hung suspended and indecisive over the keypad, Hound lowered his head closer to Bluestreak's neck and quietly breathed in his scent.

The finger dropped away and Bluestreak sighed. "Hmm, you remember any numbers?" he asked, turning his head to see Hound better. Hound jerked his head up guiltily, hoping Bluestreak hadn't noticed.

"Three," he said carefully, optics on the keypad now. "And a one."

"I've got a five and a eight. Any particular order?"

Hound shook his head.

Bluestreak grinned at him and Hound stared at his face unable to look away. _Why have I never really looked at your face before? Really looked. Did you know that you could give Sunny a run for his credits in the good looks department? No, you 'd beat him because he spoils the affect with that scowl of his._

The young 'bot's grin turned bashful under Hound's scrutiny and he ducked his head.

"Okay, uh, I guess I'll just give it a shot, then. And if that doesn't work, I'll just try again."

Hound shook himself as he registered Bluestreak's words and found himself staring at the top of Bluestreak's helmet tracing with his optics the shadows cast by Bluestreak's chevron. With another shake, he managed to pull his attention away from the young gunner's head entirely and refocus on the keypad.

Bluestreak painstakingly entered the four numbers, each button pushed after careful deliberation. They both looked up at the door. When nothing happened, Bluestreak shrugged, unconcerned. Hound shuttered his optics again, wishing he could turn off all of his other sensors since Bluestreak's every movement was sending unwanted sensations through him. He didn't need to see Bluestreak to be aware of him.

As Bluestreak studied the keypad again, Hound groaned to himself. _Primus, Blue, why do you, of all mechs, have to slow down when you get overcharged? And why do_ **_I_** _ have to lose complete control over myself. I promise I will never overcharge again if you'll just hurry up_.

"Yes," Bluestreak said suddenly and Hound unshuttered his optics in time to see the door slide open. Relieved, Hound let out a gasp of air as if he'd been holding his breath.

Straightening up with difficulty, Bluestreak laughed at Hound's reaction. "That bad, huh? Sorry it took so long, I'm having some trouble focusing. That last round must be catching up to me, but I think I can still get you into the room."

Without waiting for Hound to reply, Bluestreak took the arm that had been supporting the scout against the wall and slung it over his neck. His other arm went around Hound's waist.

Hound, suddenly overwhelmed by Bluestreak's touch, leaned against him and let the mech guide him into the room. Once inside, though, he tried to pull himself together again and pushed weakly away.

"Blue," he said, "Please...don't..."

Bluestreak stopped and looked at Hound, his arm still firmly wrapped around the other mech's waist. "Don't? You don't want me to help?" he said, a little hurt.

"No, no...it's not that." Hound managed to push at Bluestreak more strongly, breaking out of his grasp. He faced Bluestreak, trying not to stare at his optics glowing in the dim light. He swayed slightly. "It's just that you... smell so...good." He moaned to himself. _I didn't just say that out loud, did I?_

Bluestreak cocked his head at his roommate quizzically, a small puzzled smile on his face. "You said I smelled overcharged. You think that smells good?"

"You have no idea," he said lowly, avoiding Bluestreak's optics. He turned towards his bunk. "I think I'd better leave you alone now."

His back to Bluestreak, Hound didn't see the other mech's puzzled and slightly hurt expression turn to dawning realization so he was caught completely by surprise by Bluestreak's sudden tackle.

They sprawled on the floor, Bluestreak laughing hilariously, Hound shaking his head in confusion. "What are you doing?" Hound asked the floor, Bluestreak's rather substantial weight pressing him down.

"Maybe I don't want you to leave me alone," Bluestreak whispered into Hound's audio sensor and then pushed up on his arms, letting Hound twist around under him.

Hound, a little woozy from the tackle and dizzy from the high grade, stared at other 'bot's very amused face. Bluestreak's smile was infectious and Hound grinned back. Before making any other moves, though, he asked, "You're sure?"

Bluestreak nodded then leaned down and tentatively kissed Hound. His scent wafted around Hound's olfactory sensors and the scout pulled the odors deeper into his sensors with a quick intake of air.

"Mmmmm," he murmured against Bluestreak's mouth.

Bluestreak giggled at the gentle vibrations of Hound's vocalization and started to pull away but Hound captured his face in his hands and pulled him back kissing him deeply. His optics faded offline as his sensitive fingers gently explored Bluestreak's face not only feeling the warm supple metal against his hands but tasting it as well. With a will of their own, his hands tenderly found and caressed every little seam on Bluestreak's face, finally letting eager fingers slide over the red chevron perched on his forehead. He savored the clean, metallic taste of his plating and the traces of energon around Bluestreak's mouth and on his faceplates.

Bluestreak shuddered and pulled his head away, breaking the kiss. Hound strained up to capture Bluestreak again, but the young 'bot shook his head. "Hound," he gasped.

Hound unshuttered his optics and gazed at Bluestreak's face, suddenly realizing something. "You've never done this before, have you?" he asked, his voice gentle.

"No...but I know the basics...sort of," Bluestreak responded, uncertainty coloring his voice.

Hound let his head settle back to the floor and ran a light fingertip over Bluestreak's cheek and across his lip components. "Don't be embarrassed. I'm flattered," he whispered.

Bluestreak seemed to savor the touch, his optics dimming. "Flattered? Really? Why?" he asked dreamily.

"You chose me to be your first. Some mechs see it as a huge responsibility." Bluestreak's optics brightened as he regarded Hound nervously. "Don't fret," Hound soothed him, lightly tracing the young mech's lips with his fingertip. "I see it as a joy and an honor especially when it's someone I care deeply about."

"Oh," Bluestreak managed to say. "And here I thought it was because we're both too cratered to control ourselves."

Hound let go of Bluestreak's head, arms falling to his sides, and began to laugh. "That too, Blue." He sobered slightly, his smile fading as he studied the young mech. It really was an honor, one he didn't take lightly.

He took in Bluestreak's quirky grin and bright optics and pulled his head down to kiss him again. Wrapping his legs around Bluestreak's hips Hound very gently rolled the younger mech over so that he was on top.

He let his hands wander over the Blue's silvery-gray armor exploring all the nooks and crannies and transform seams. Every so often, Bluestreak would shiver and he'd pause and devote a little more attention to the discovery.

After long minutes of Hound's ministrations, Bluestreak began to gain confidence. His hands wandered over Hound's armor seeming to find and stimulate every sensor. Hound shivered and nuzzled Bluestreak's neck.

"Are you sure this is your first time," the tracker asked quietly.

Bluestreak nodded. "I'm just copying you…and Sideswipe told me some stuff too. It's okay, isn't it? I wouldn't want to do anything wrong." He sounded less overcharged now, the activity burning off the effects of the high grade.

"You're fine, Blue. It's just right." Hound was feeling more grounded as well, his mind had stopped floating away as he sobered up. As his rational mind began to take control, Bluestreak's babbling started to make sense. He paused, his hands hovering uncertainly above the canards on the gunner's arms. Suddenly he was afraid to touch them, afraid of what the taste sensors there would tell him. Bluestreak had been with Sideswipe earlier in the evening. He'd left. Why? He hadn't been upset, Hound would've known. Or had he missed something? Hound been very drunk, though, and it was possible he'd missed something, something as subtle as unease.

He lowered his hands and gently stroked the tiny wings, afraid of what he'd find but needing to know. If what he suspected was true, he was doing Blue a disservice, almost taking advantage of him and his overcharged state.

Bluestreak shivered under the touch and Hound tasted the tiny traces of energon there. He shuttered his optics. He knew who'd put the energon there.

"Blue," Hound whispered. "Blue, stop. Please."

Bluestreak pulled his hands back, startled. The hurt was obvious on his face. "What'd I do? Did I do something wrong?"

"No, no, Blue. You're fine, perfect, in fact but I have to ask…is this what you really want…from me?"

"What? I…Hound? Of course, this is what I want. Don't you?"

"But do you want me?" He could see the confusion, hurt, and even indecision in Bluestreak's face grow. "I love you, Blue, but not in the way you deserve. I CAN be your first but I think you'd be happier with…someone else, someone who loves you and has said so. Maybe not in those exact words." He saw understanding in Bluestreak's expression. "He has said it in those words, hasn't he?"

When Bluestreak nodded, Hound leaned over and gently kissed him on the chevron. "Don't be afraid. Okay?" He rolled off of the young 'bot, stood and offered him a hand up.

Bluestreak took the hand and pulled himself to his feet. He stood staring at Hound for a moment. "But what about you?"

Hound shut his optics again. If he kept looking at Bluestreak, he didn't think he could control himself. He wanted him, he wanted now and he couldn't have him. "Don't worry about me, Blue. I'll be fine." It wasn't quite a lie.

Bluestreak's hand went out to touch Hound and then pulled back before making contact. "Okay, if you're sure," he said with concern but also with something like relief.

"I'm sure." Hound looked at him finally. He reached out and gently cupped Bluestreak's face in his hand pulling him close, kissing him again. Bluestreak leaned into it and then broke it, sighing.

"Thank you," he said and reluctantly pushed away from Hound. He backed toward the door not taking his optics off of the green mech. "For everything." He looked away from Hound and back again as the door opened. "I'll see you later, then." Implying that it would be much later.

Hound nodded, his feet pulling him unconsciously after Bluestreak. "Later."

The door slid shut and Hound leaned his forehead against it. He'd done the right thing, he knew, but he couldn't help feeling a bit jealous of Sideswipe. Fragging lucky mech. He'd better treat Blue well or there'd be slag to pay.

He was still leaning against the door when the chime sounded. Startled by the unexpected visitor he stood up and let the door open. He stepped back at the sight of the big yellow mech smirking at him. Sunstreaker pushed his way past Hound.

"I hear it was your fault I got kicked out of my room tonight?" He turned and grinned at Hound. "What are you going to do about it?"

Hound grinned back. "What'd you have in mind?"


End file.
